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What Do I Put On A Headstone?

6/18/2018

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Trying to come up with the perfect phrasing or words to put on a loved ones memorial can be, to say the least, quite daunting and overwhelming. Hopefully this article will shed some light on the topic for you, and help you through these decisions.
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Where to Start

First off, there's no such thing as a "Perfect" memorial. What you should remember is that its 'perfection' is truly, 100%, dependent on only one thing.

Whatever you want!

I know that answer sounds extremely broad and generic, but its true. In all honesty, the headstone is hardly for the deceased. Its for the family members and loved ones to look at in remembrance. Its not being made for anybody else.

Many times, people use headstones of loved ones as a tool, to help overcome times of grief and heartache. 

So what it comes down to, is whats going to make you & your family, happy. What pictures, words, or phrases are going to bring you back to the best memories you ever had with that person. What symbols or icons of your past could translate that for you, even in decades to come?

Here's an example to show what I mean.
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To most people, the background to this photo might not look like much. An old fence, surrounded by dead grass. But to this family, even the background is a memory close to their hearts. 

Button, was building this fence with his sons before he had passed away and to them, there couldn't be a better symbol of what he stood for and will stand for in their lives.

This is a very good example of finding something that will have meaning to you, forever, and remind you of the good times. 

What if I can't customize it?

Often times, our customers will come to us having absolutely no idea of what to put on their marker, and that's okay.

We've seen customers order headstones for deceased ancestors, or distant relatives in which case personal information can be very limited, and a more generic type of design is required. 
 
Also, Its very common to still be heavily grieving or still in shock while ordering a headstone for a close loved one, in order to meet a funeral deadline or whatnot. In which case, these types of decisions couldn't be more overwhelming. 

Don't Worry!!

Stacey and I are very familiar with this, and it's okay. There is no rush on these designs (Unless you have a deadline). We can basically work at whatever pace the customer is willing to work at. Don't feel bad about 'taking a long time' to decide on a design, we will help you. And if you need it rushed, we will do our best to accommodate that as well. 

But WHAT Do I say?

Traditionally, we put the persons name, their date of birth, and date of death. And maybe something more personal. Here's a list of some common headstone epitaphs.
  • In remembrance of 
  • In loving memory of 
  • Forever in our hearts 
  • Sunrise [Birth date] Sunset [Deceased date]
  • Fond memories of
  • Was called home

Using Bible verses, poems, letters, nicknames, or even a favorite snippet or verse from a song are also common. 

Seriously, don't feel embarrassed or 'tacky' for putting your loved ones favorite Taylor Swift song lyrics on their headstone. Remember, Its for you.

Check out the website Love Lives On for bible verses that would be appropriate and applicable for an epitaph.

Check out the website Natural Endings for poems that you may want to use. They're all fairly long, so if you don't feel like trying to cram all of it onto a marker, just choose a line or two.

We Encourage our Customers to Be Creative!

We love when our customers really get creative and make something  close to their heart in one way or another. Here are a few of the most unique products we've made. ​
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ArcLight's Process

Let me explain our design process a little bit. 

Once the customer places an order, we will contact you asking for any design details or pictures you might have. Once you send us a name and photo and maybe a few basic ideas that you'd like, Stacey can get started. 

Here's an example of a customers original photo they would like engraved on a headstone.
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Using the picture(s) and information given, Stacey will create 3 separate designs for you to choose from. From there, you're allowed to pick and choose whatever you'd like, until you're completely satisfied. ​
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Once you're completely satisfied with your design, then, and only then, will your product be engraved. 

We will never engrave without your permission.

Here's the finished product:
Final Product of Granite Headstone
Size: 12x24x4


Blurry Photos, Bad Quality Photos, Old Photos

This is where Stacey's real expertise comes in. If you'd like a headstone of a loved one made with their photo on it, but you only have 1 photo and its from 1950 with a water spot in the middle- She can make it work.

Now, we can't guarantee that it will look perfect. The best photos are high quality, with very little solid black or solid white in the photo. Although, Stacey is very good at what she does, and there does tend to be some wiggle room with that.

This customer had to take a digital picture on their phone, of a badly printed picture. Here are the results.
Original Photo
Original Photo
Proof of Picture
Chosen proof of marker
Final Product
Final Product
If you look closely at the original picture, you can even see the reflection of the customer holding her phone to take the picture. 

​Sometimes, all we have are blurry photos, and its important to us that our customers aren't discouraged by this.  
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Now, we have also worked with very old photos before as well.

​Here are some of our absolute favorites!
These original photos were taken anywhere from the late 1940's - 1960's. 

If you have a photo you'd like to use but aren't sure if it would come out well, send us a picture of it and we'll let you know our opinion.

Pricing

You're probably thinking, okay, now what are the prices on these things and what do you charge per word or photo, like every other headstone company.
Let me break it down for you.
  • We offer 100% FREE shipping on ALL products. 
  • We have NO word limit, line limit, or character limit.
  • NO design restrictions
  • 1 Photo + Background photo Included 
And this is ALL included in our base price. No hidden fees. The only reason we cant offer unlimited photos without charging more (35$ for every extra picture) is that it takes an extensive amount of time and expertise to edit the photos to make them granite ready. 

If you'd like to check out the prices of our headstones, urns, or other products click the button below.
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    Author

    Hi, I'm Michael from ArcLight. I've been writing casually for 5 years now, including writing and directing several theatrical plays produced in my hometown.  I've been working for ArcLight for a little over a year and couldn't be happier. I love facts, history, science and writing. This blog will explain the ins and outs of the company, the industry, and even the folk-lore behind burials and cemeteries. 

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arclightind@gmail.com